ENTERTAINMENT OF THE GUEST

4286. Abd Shuraib al-Adawi reported: My ears listened and my eye saw when Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) spoke and said: He who believes In Allah and the hereafter should show respect to the guest even with utmost kindness and courtesy. They said: Messenger of Allah, what is this utmost kindness and courtesy? He replied: It is for a day and a night. Hospitality extends for three days, and what is beyond that is a Sadaqa for him; and he who believes in Allah and the Hereafter should say something good or keep quiet.

4287. Abu Shuriah al-Khuza'i reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: (The period of the entertainment of a guest is three days, and utmost kindness and courtesy is for a day and a night. =" It is not permissible for a Muslim to stay with, his brother until he makes him sinful. They said: Messenger of Allah, how he would make him sinful? He (the Holy Prophet) said: He stays with him (so long) that nothing is left with him to entertain him.

4288. Sa'id al-Maqburi reported: I heard Abu Shuraih al-Khuzill saying: My ears heard and my eyes saw and my mind retained it, when Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) spoke this, and he then narrated the hadith and made mention of this:" It is not permissible for any one of you to stay with his brother until he makes him sinful."

4289. 'Uqba b. Amir reported: We said to Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him): You send us out and we come to the people who do not give us hospitality, so what is your opinion? Thereupon Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: If you come to the people who order for you what is befitting a guest, accept it; but if they do not. take from them what befits them to give to a guest.

Sahih Muslim
by Imam Muslim, translation by Abdul Hamid Siddiqui, Volume: The Book Pertaining to Judicial Decisions (Kitab Al-Aqdiyya)

Wasted knowledge and rhyming prayers

Ibn ‘Abbâs – Allâh be pleased with him – said, “Address the people once a week, and if you must do so more often, then twice; and if you have to do even more, then three times; and do not make people tired or bored with the Quran. Let me not find you coming to the people to exhort them and tell them stories while they are speaking amongst themselves, thus interrupting their conversation and tiring them. Instead, listen, and when they tell you, address them when they desire to listen to your speech. And beware of making your supplications rhyme, stay away from this, for I found Allâh’s Messenger – peace and praise of Allâh be upon him – and his Companions doing nothing but [staying away from this].”

Al-Bukhârî, Al-Sahîh ‘What is hated about making supplications rhyme.’

Notes

In this narration, the illustrious Companion ‘Abdullâh b. ‘Abbâs gives some guidelines about being wise and aware of people’s condition when teaching them and calling them to Allâh. He advised that a person should not address the people and give talks to them too often, lest they become bored or fed up of hearing the Quran. This consideration is taken from the Sunnah of the Prophet – Allâh’s praise and peace be upon him – as related by Ibn Mas’ûd.

This tradition also expresses the dislike of trying to disseminate knowledge in a way that might be detrimental to its purpose. We are discouraged from spreading knowledge to those who do not desire it or those who are not enthusiastic to receive it and interrupting people while they are speaking. We are encouraged to teach knowledge to those who express their desire for it, because all this means it is more likely that the recipient will benefit from this knowledge.

The narration also warns against the practice of trying to make du’â (supplication) rhyme. This is because occupying oneself with putting together rhyming prayers conflicts with the state of being humble and imploring Allâh, which is how a person should be when supplicating. There is no contradiction between this disliked behavior and the fact that some of the Prophetic supplications and statements rhyme, because the Prophet never used to have to try and make them rhyme, but was effortlessly eloquent and at the same time fully humbled in front of Allâh.
Adapted from Ibn Hajr, Fath Al-Bârî.

Greeting the Children

Greeting the Children
862. Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported that he passed by some children and greeted them. Then he said: "Messenger of Allah (PBUH) used to do the same.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary: By greeting children, we please their hearts and also vent our modesty. Besides, the importance of As-Salam is unconsciously felt by them. Above all it is the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and so we are supposed to put it into practice.
Source: Riyad Saliheen

Spending on Family

Narrated Abu Mas'ud Al-Ansari:
The Prophet said, "When a Muslim spends something on his family intending to receive Allah's reward it is regarded as Sadaqa (charity) for him."
Bukhari,Volume 7, Book 64, Number 263


Narrated Sad:
The Prophet visited me at Mecca while I was ill. I said (to him), "I have property; May I bequeath all my property in Allah's Cause?" He said, "No." I said, "Half of it?" He said, "No." I said, "One third of it?" He said, "One-third (is alright), yet it is still too much, for you'd better leave your inheritors wealthy than leave them poor, begging of others. Whatever you spend will be considered a Sadaqa for you, even the mouthful of food you put in the mouth of your wife. Anyhow Allah may let you recover, so that some people may benefit by you and others be harmed by you."
Bukhari,Volume 7, Book 64, Number 266


Narrated 'Aisha:
Hind bint 'Utba came and said, "O Allah's Apostle! Abu Sufyan is a miser so is it sinful of me to feed our children from his property?" Allah's Apostle said, "No except if you take for your needs what is just and reasonable
Bukhari,Volume 7, Book 64, Number 272


Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet said, "If the wife gives of her husband's property (something in charity) without his permission, he will get half the reward."
Bukhari,Volume 7, Book 64, Number 273


Narrated Al-Aswad bin Yazid:
I asked 'Aisha "What did the Prophet use to do at home?" She said, "He used to work for his family, and when he heard the Adhan (call for the prayer), he would go out."
Bukhari,Volume 7, Book 64, Number 276

Do not take more time and bore people

Narrated Ibn Mas'ud:
The Prophet used to take care of us in preaching by selecting a suitable time, so that we might not get bored. (He abstained from pestering us with sermons and knowledge all the time).
Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 3, Number 68


Narrated Anas bin Malik:
The Prophet said, "Facilitate things to people (concerning religious matters), and do not make it hard for them and give them good tidings and do not make them run away (from Islam)."
Bukhari,Volume 1, Book 3, Number 69


Narrated Abu Wail:
'Abdullah used to give a religious talk to the people on every Thursday. Once a man said, "O Aba 'Abdur-Rahman! (By Allah) I wish if you could preach us daily." He replied, "The only thing which prevents me from doing so, is that I hate to bore you, and no doubt I take care of you in preaching by selecting a suitable time just as the Prophet used to do with us, for fear of making us bored."
Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 3, Number 70


Narrated Muawiya:
I heard Allah's Apostle saying, "If Allah wants to do good to a person, He makes him comprehend the religion. I am just a distributor, but the grant is from Allah. (And remember) that this nation (true Muslims) will keep on following Allah's teachings strictly and they will not be harmed by any one going on a different path till Allah's order (Day of Judgment) is established."
Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 3, Number 71

Narrated `Aishah (radiallahu `anhaa): The Prophet (May Allah Exalt
His Mention) came in when a woman was sitting beside me. He asked me,
"Who is she?" I said: "She is the one whose performance of Salat
(prayer) has become the talk of the town." Addressing her, he
(sallallaahu `alaihi wa sallam) said, (What is this!) You are required
to take upon yourselves only what you can carry out easily. By Allah,
Allah does not withhold His Mercy and forgiveness of you until you
neglect and give up (good works). Allah likes the deeds best which a
worshipper can carry out constantly." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Narrated Anas (radiallahu `anhu): Allah's Messenger (sallallaahu
`alaihi wa sallam) came into the mosque and noticed a rope stretched
between two poles. He enquired, "What is this rope for?" He was told:
"This is Zainab's rope. When during her voluntary prayer, she begins
to feel tired, she grasps it for support." Allah's Messenger said,
"Untie it. You should offer prayers so long as you feel active. When
you feel tired, you should go to sleep." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Narrated Jabir Ibn Samurah (radiallahu `anhu): I used to observe
prayer with the Prophet (May Allah Exalt His Mention) (sallallaahu
`alaihi wa sallam) and his Salat (prayer) was of a moderate length and
his (Khutbah) sermon too was moderate in length. [Muslim]

Narrated Ibn `Abbas (radiallahu `anhumaa): While the Prophet (May
Allah Exalt His Mention) (sallallaahu `alaihi wa sallam) was
delivering Khutbah (religious talk), he noticed a man who was
standing, so he asked about him and was told that he was Abu Israel
who had taken a vow to remain standing and not sit, or go into the
shade, or speak while observing fasting. Thereupon Allah's Messenger
said, "Command him to speak, to go into the shade, to sit and to
complete his fast". [Al-Bukhari]

Narrated 'Aisha:

Whenever Allah's Apostle ordered the Muslims to do something, he used to order them deeds which were easy for them to do, (according to their strength endurance). They said, "O Allah's Apostle! We are not like you. Allah has forgiven your past and future sins." So Allah's Apostle became angry and it was apparent on his face. He said, "I am the most Allah fearing, and know Allah better than all of you do."
Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 2, Number 19

And it goes on which shows that be moderate....and that advise from Rasoolullah is for our good

Narrated Talha bin 'Ubaidullah:
A man from Najd with unkempt hair came to Allah's Apostle and we heard his loud voice but could not understand what he was saying, till he came near and then we came to know that he was asking about Islam. Allah's Apostle said, "You have to offer prayers perfectly five times in a day and night (24 hours)." The man asked, "Is there any more (praying)?" Allah's Apostle replied, "No, but if you want to offer the Nawafil prayers (you can)." Allah's Apostle further said to him: "You have to observe fasts during the month of Ramad, an." The man asked, "Is there any more fasting?" Allah's Apostle replied, "No, but if you want to observe the Nawafil fasts (you can.)" Then Allah's Apostle further said to him, "You have to pay the Zakat (obligatory charity)." The man asked, "Is there any thing other than the Zakat for me to pay?" Allah's Apostle replied, "No, unless you want to give alms of your own." And then that man retreated saying, "By Allah! I will neither do less nor more than this." Allah's Apostle said, "If what he said is true, then he will be successful (i.e. he will be granted Paradise)."
Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 2, Number 44

The goal of your talk should be good and beneficial
Talk can be dangerous. So, we should control it within the limits of Islam, guided by Allah (S.W.T.) and his Messenger Mohammed (S.A.W.).

The goal of your talk should be good and beneficial. If you cannot intend to have a good talk, then you should remain silent and that is good by itself. This is because the Prophet (S.A.W.) says reported by Imam Bukhari and Muslim,

"Whosoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him say good or remain silent."

Refrain from swearing unless it is necessary. Allah (S.W.T.) says in Surat Al-Baqarah, (Verse 224), what can be translated as,

"And do not make Allah’s (Name) an excuse in you oaths."

Talk only within your knowledge and expertise, and do not talk about what you do not know. Allah (S.W.T.) says in Surat Al-Isra’a, (Verse 36), what can be translated as,

"And do not follow (say) that of which you have no knowledge."

Do not talk to people about everything you hear without investigation and confirmation, because you may hear from others the truthfulness and falsehood and what is true and what is doubtful. If you talk about everything you hear, you will be sharing the sins. The prophet (S.A.W.) warns us in an authentic hadith,

"It is enough sin a person commits when he talks about everything he hears."

Make sure that the goal from your talk and conversation with others is to reach the truth, and reveal the falsehood. And do not be concerned whether the truth is reached and falsehood is revealed by you or by others.

Those who talk uselessly-and those who put down others-shows off when they talk
Make your talk clear, simple, devoid of words that are difficult to understand, devoid of eloquency when it is not necessary, and devoid of anything that puts down others because the prophet (S.A.W.) hates this kind of talk. The prophet (S.A.W.) says in a fair hadith reported by Imam At-tirmithi,

"The people whom I hate the most and who are the farthest from me on the Day of Judgment are those who talk uselessly, and those who put down others, and those who shows off when they talk."

Make your talk calm, clear, audible and understood by others. The prophet (S.A.W.) used to repeat the word three times to make sure that it is understood and his talk was simple that everyone can understand. Be serious in your talk and do not joke much, and if you joke, be truthful like the prophet (S.A.W.) used to do.

Do not interrupt another person when he talks and listen to what he has to say till he finishes his point, then follow up on what he said with what is good and beneficial if the follow-up is necessary or useful, not just because you want to talk aimlessly.

Talk -Devoid of harming, hurting, putting down, and making fun of others.
Talk and debate in a nice way which is devoid of harming, hurting, putting down, and making fun of others. This good way of talk was commanded by all messengers. Allah (S.W.T.) said to Mousa and his brother Haroun, when he sent them to Pharaoh in Surat Taha, (Verse 44),

"And speak to him (Pharaoh) mildly, perhaps he may accept admoition or fear Allah."

So, you are not better than Mousa and Haroun nor that person you are talking to is worse than Pharaoh.

Do not reject everything others have said if you have noticed a mixture of right and wrong or a mixture of truth and falsehood, because right should not be rejected even if it is said along with some other things that are independently wrong. Truth should not be rejected if it is said along with some other things that are independently false. You should accept the right and the truth and reject only the wrong and falsehood, and this is the justice and fairness that Allah (S.W.T.) commanded us to do.

Do not complement yourself and pat yourself
Do not complement yourself and pat yourself on the back in front of people, because usually this is a result of arrogance which Allah (S.W.T.) forbade us from in Surat An-Najm, (Verse 32), what can be translated as,

"Do not complement yourself, He (Allah) knows best of those who are pious."

Refrain from being involved in useless arguments
Refrain from being involved in useless arguments which sole purpose is to put down and prevail over others. Because being aimlessly argumentative is from the signs of misguidance (We seek refuge with Allah from it).

For this reason, the prophet (S.A.W.) warned us in an authentic hadith reported by Imam At-trimithi,

"A people did not get misguided after Allah had guided them, but they were aimlessly argumentative."

Abandon useless arguments even if the truth is on your side to prevent useless argument-full conversation.

The prophet (S.A.W.) says in another authentic hadith reported by Imam Abu-Dawud,

"I guarantee a house in the surroundings of Paradise for the one who stopped being aimlessly argumentative even if he is right."

Nobody is perfect

Nobody is perfect.....A famous line everyone says........But when we see something or anything good in a person or in ourself..........Sometimes we do praise them or praise ourselves (deep in our heart)........I always fear that as I am a human.......Alhamdulillah...Allah says

"It (this Quran) is only a Reminder for all the 'Alamin (mankind and jinns).38:87

And this Ayah (53:32) is a reminder so that when Shaithan sows seeds of arrogance or pride in our heart or make us a farmer to sow a seed in others hearts ..........And with that Allah says that we are humans we will make mistakes.....And if we make mistakes Allah will forgive us when we repent...so never despair....Alhamdulillah:)

Those who avoid the major sins and immoralities, only [committing] slight ones. Indeed, your Lord is vast in forgiveness. He was most knowing of you when He produced you from the earth and when you were fetuses in the wombs of your mothers. So do not claim yourselves to be pure; He is most knowing of who fears Him.53:32

Allah then showed their works in the life of the world, saying: (Those who avoid enormities of sin) i.e. idolatry and the major sins (and abominations) adultery and transgressions, (save the unwilled offences) except a furtive look, a taunt, a censure which they then blame themselves for committing and repent of doing; it is also said that this means: except marrying ((for them) lo! thy Lord is of vast mercy) towards he who repents of major and minor sins. (He is best aware of you) than your own selves (when He created you from the earth) He created you from Adam and Adam is from dust and dust is from the earth, (and when ye were) small (hidden in the bellies of your mothers) Allah knew in these circumstances what will ensue from you. (Therefore ascribe not purity unto yourselves) do not absolve yourselves from committing sins. (He is best aware of him who wardeth off (evil)) transgression and does good. Tanwîr al-Miqbâs min Tafsîr Ibn ‘Abbâs


Those who avoid grave sins and abominations, excepting lesser offences, that is, minor sins, such as a look, a kiss or a touch (this constitutes a discontinuous exception, in other words the meaning is: but lesser offences are forgiven by the avoidance of grave sins). Truly your Lord is of vast forgiveness, for such [lesser sins] and for accepting repentance. The following was revealed regarding those who used to say, ‘[What of] our prayers, our fasting, and our pilgrimage!’. He knows you best [from the time] when He produced you from the earth, that is to say, [when] He created your father Adam from dust, and when you were hidden [fetuses] (ajinna is the plural of janīn) in the bellies of your mothers. So do not claim purity for yourselves, do not praise yourselves, that is, in admiration; but [if it is done] in recognition of [God’s] grace, then that is fine. He knows best those who are God-fearing. Tafsir al-Jalalayn

Encouraging Repentance and forbidding Claims of Purity for Oneself

Allah's statement,

(verily, your Lord is of vast forgiveness.) asserts that His Mercy encompasses everything, and His forgiveness entails every type of sin, if one repents,

(Say: "O My servants who have transgressed against them- selves! Despair not of the mercy of Allah: verily, Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.'') (39:53) Allah said,

(He knows you well when He created you from the earth,) Allah says, `He was and still is the All-Knowing Whose knowledge encompasses your affairs, statements and all of the actions that will be committed by you, even when He created your father `Adam from the earth and took his offspring from his loin, as small as ants. He then divided them into two groups, a group destined for Paradise and a group to Hellfire,'

(and when you were fetuses in your mothers' wombs.) when He commanded the angel to record one's provisions, age, actions and if he would be among the miserable or the happy. Allah said,

(So, ascribe not purity to yourselves.) forbidding one from ascribing purity and praising himself and thinking highly of his actions,

(He knows best him who has Taqwa.) Allah said in another Ayah,

(Have you not seen those who claim sanctity for themselves. Nay, but Allah sanctifies whom He wills, and they will not be dealt with unjustly, even equal to the extent of a Fatil.) (4:49) In his Sahih, Muslim recorded that Muhammad bin `Amr bin `Ata said, "I called my daughter, Barrah (the pious one), and Zaynab bint Abu Salamah said to me, `The Messenger of Allah forbade using this name. I was originally called Barrah and he said,

(Do not ascribe purity to yourselves; Allah knows best who the pious people among you are)' They said, `What should we call her' He said,

(Call her Zaynab.)'' Imam Ahmad recorded a Hadith from `Abdur-Rahman bin Abi Bakrah, from his father who said, "A man praised another man before the Prophet . The Messenger of Allah said,

(Woe to you, you have cut off the neck of your friend! (He repeated this) If one of you must praise a friend of his, let him say, "I think that so-and-so is this and that; Allah knows best about him and I will never purify anyone before Allah,'' if he knows his friend to be as he is describing him.)'' Al-Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawud and Ibn Majah collected this Hadith. Imam Ahmad recorded that Hammam bin Al-Harith said, "A man came before `Uthman bin `Affan and praised him. Al-Miqdad bin Al-Aswad started throwing sand in the face of that man, saying, `The Messenger of Allah ordered us to throw sand in their faces when we see those who praise.''' Muslim and Abu Dawud also collected this Hadith.

What a Muslim should say when he is praised
Allaahumma laa tu'aakhithnee bimaa yaqooloona, waghfir lee maa laa ya'lamoona (waj'alnee khayram-mimmaa yadhunnoon)
O Allah, do not call me to account for what they say and forgive me for what they have no knowledge of (and make better than they imagine)
Al Bukhari, Al-Adabul-Mufrad (no.585) The portion between brackets is from Al Bayhaqi, Shu'ab Al Iman 4/228, and comes another account.


                                                 

Good Manners in Dealing with the Ignorant
Imam Ibn ul Qayyim al Jawziyyah

Ar-Risaalah at-Tabookiyyah

After a person turns away from the company of those [ignorant associates], and he turns to the company of those who are absent in person - but whose bounties and good influence continue to exist in the world, he would then inquire a new zeal and a new direction, and he would become stranger among the people - even if he be a relative or a close acquaintance.
This would make him a dear stranger to people. He can clearly see the obscurity that they suffer, but they cannot see the splendor which he enjoys. He excuses them as much as he can, while enjoining and advising them to do good with all of his power. Thus he looks at them with two eyes:
a. With one eye, he recognizes Allah's commands and prohibitions. Based of this, he advises or warns them, and befriends and disowns them, giving them their rights and requiring his.
b. With the other eye, he recognizes Allah's Decree and Measure. Based on this, he sympathizes with them; he makes du`aa' (supplications) for them; he asks Allah (ta`aalaa) to forgive them; and he seeks excuses for them in matters that do not involve violation of Allah's commands and His Shar` (Allah's Divine Law). He engulfs them with kindness, compassion and forgiveness, heeding to Allah's command [to His Messenger (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam)]:
"Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish." (Al-A`raaf 7:199)
If a person abides by this aayah, it would suffice and cure him. It calls for:
a. Good manners in dealing with people: by forgiving them and showing them compassion to the limits of one's character and nature.
b. Fulfilling Allah's rights in people by enjoining what is good, which applies to matters that the minds attest to their goodness and merit, based on what Allah has commanded.
c. Avoiding their evil: to ward off the harm resulting from their ignorance, without trying to avenge himself.
How else can a person attain perfection? And what policy and behavior can be better in this world than this? If a man tries to consider every evil reaching him from people (I mean a true evil that results in a loss of honor before Allah (Ta`aalaa)), he will find that it arises from neglecting one or more of these three matters. If he abides by them all, then whatever is inflicted on him by people will be good, even if it appears to be evil. Only good can result from enjoining good, even if it be encased in a situation of evil and harm. Allah (Ta`aalaa) said;
"Verily! Those who brought forth the great slander [against `Aa'ishah (radhiallahu `anhaa)] are a group among you. Consider it not a bad thing for you. Nay, it is good for you…" [An-Noor 24:11]
And He addressed His Messenger (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) by saying:
"So forgive them, ask Allah to forgive them, and consult them in the affair. Then when you have taken a decision, put your full trust in Allah." [Aal `Imraan 3:159]
This aayah instructs the Messenger (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) to fulfill Allah's rights and the people's rights. When people do wrong, they would either be violating Allah's limits or harming His Messenger personally. If they harm the Messenger (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam), he shoud respond by forgiving them. But if they overstep Allah's limits, then he (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) should ask Allah (Ta`aala) to forgive them and to soften their hearts. Also, he (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) should extract their opinions by consulting them, because this tends to make them more obedient and willing to advise. Once he forms his decision, he should seek advice no more, but rather put his trust in Allah and go forth to fulfill what he decided, for Allah loves those who trust Him.